Winning hearts and minds in Iraq, Southern style

Friday, December 4, 2009

In a rare moment of honesty and insight three years ago, Senator Joe Biden proposed a solution to the Iraq stalemate: let the three culturally distinct regions assume full or limited sovereignty. The idea was raked by the usual suspects, including the Neocon and leftist punditry who could not conceive of a nation-state founded on such quaint notions as self-determination and historical affinity. Big, ambitious government was the only thing they could imagine uniting people. However, the growing local sovereignty movement saw in the proposal at least partial vindication of the Confederate ideal.

Here’s another such vindication, from an e-mail sent by a Southern soldier fighting in Iraq. As Alexander Stephens predicted, the Cause of the South is indeed the Cause of us all.

I was discussing my Southern heritage with some other Southern-born troops when an Iraqi interpreter that was sitting with us perked up when I said my country had once fought the United States and is now under occupation. He was very interested in that so the next day I brought my Confederate Battle Flag out of my room and presented him with it. He was more than thrilled and in turn the following day brought me an antique Iraqi prayer rug as a gift.

To my surprise about 3 days later I received an invite from a local Sheik to a lamb feast where when I got there I was surprised to find several Iraqi higher-ranking officers to include the local Police Chief and the Colonel of the local troops and then there on the wall was my CBF. I’m thinking that I was totally screwed now and expecting the MPs to walk in at any minute and haul my ass out for some kind of PR screw up.

I was totally amazed when I found out that I was the guest of honor. The locals were very interested in the history of our Southern ancestry and amazed that we as a conquered people would still fight for the U.S. I had to explain that the American concept of democracy and free enterprise is still a great idea but that our dream of constitutional freedom was better. They liked the idea of state sovereignty and all agreed that Iraq would be better off modeled after the old Confederacy than the modern America.

When I left all of them wanted their own CBF so several of us ordered a few from home and gave them away under the utmost secrecy so that we wouldn’t get our arses in a sling. 2 days later when we went out to the local police post there flying under the Iraqi flag was none other than one of the CBFs we had given away. The look on the face of the CO was priceless. He was more than shocked as he was from Ohio and couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Needless to say the flag stayed there and flew until it deteriorated and fell apart. I haven’t had a chance to get out to the out lying FOBs (Forward Operating Bases) in a while with my current job but I still love to educate the locals on our Southern history and how much Saddam was like Lincoln in his tyrrany…they love it. Oh well…winning hearts and minds Southern style.

Now that’s Southern hospitality — sharing our history and political wisdom with foreigners who’re unaware of the promise of constitutional, limited government, whether they’re from Iraq or Ohio.

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By |2009-12-08T12:45:36+00:00December 8th, 2009|News|Comments Off on News 1520